The Nation

EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE| CONTACT Queen St Mall Hungry Jacks has finally been officially recognised as one of Brisbane’s most treasured buildings. The iconic landmark was reportedly added to the register after it became apparent just how popular the location was for people ‘waiting for a mate.’ Locals are said to be praising the decision and have unanimously agreed that the council...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A local piece of sun-dried devon has bought himself a needlessly expensive diary today in the hope that it'll turn his pointless life around. This year marks the first year that Oliver O'Reardon's mother hasn't purchased a Moleskine diary for him. He says it's because he's an unmarried 34-year-old with the lung function of someone...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A local fly-in-fly-out worker has welcomed the end of this week as it's been a tough one for him. Friends of Dale Greenholm tell The Advocate that the 28-year-old's brain has always blown a bit of blue smoke. "Which means it's fucked. Piston rings are shot," said one pal. "Guess that's why he's always though Australia should...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Police in the nation's bottom-drawer state has finally caught up with the man responsible for lighting a number of fires up and down the eastern seaboard this season. Dry Lightning, 25, was arrested earlier today by detectives and uniformed police officers in Sale, in eastern Victora, ending a month-long manhunt. Mr Lightning, who has no fixed...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A Betoota Heights man says he's being gaslit by his domestic partner about him allegedly leaving the toilet seat up - despite not having a memory of doing so. Marc Poink, who during the day does something with a computer in an office downtown, sat down with our reporter on the D46 bus back to...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Former Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull has taken to social media this afternoon to share his thoughts on a current issue he could've helped prevent when he was calling the shots. On Twitter this afternoon, Mr Turnbull made reference to the climate in some vague sense, followed by a hypothetical solution to the problem foreshadowed at...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A polite, happy-go-lucky pastoralist from the edge of our cosmopolitan desert community hasn't been able to count his sheep for weeks, he says. Each time John Graham Rawlins, of "Delga Downs" on the Durham Road, has his dogs push a mob of wethers through a gate he winds up falling asleep almost immediately. The 28-year-old says...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT One of the great brawlers of the 2010s is now a fully fledged birko man, it has been confirmed. 28-year-old refrigeration mechanic, Pumper, has had to take the 'Ian Roberts Approach' to his new decision to wear the controversial cork-soled sandals. Meaning, if anyone wants to make fun of him because he's into something that they are not...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Cricketing great Doug Bollinger is auctioning off his iconic 'Baggy Blonde' for the bushfire appeal, joining a number of other sporting greats parting with some of their most beloved memorabilia. The former fast bowler took to social media this morning, welcoming his followers to bid on the hair plugs he had put in shortly before...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The Prime Minister released a statement on the retaliatory strikes from Iran on a number of US military bases in Iraq a short time ago, outlining that the NSW Government is partly to blame for it. Scotty, from marketing, detailed that the 'unfolding events in Iraq' were in part due to his government not wanting...