The Nation

Local Blackfella Hasn’t Forgotten What Pauline Hanson Said About Him In 1996

6 July, 2016. 10:35 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact Local Betoota Blackfella, Ian Fischer (28) says he still hasn't forgotten the things Pauline Hanson said him in the late nineties. "Yeah she's not too popular with our mob," he says while pouring Holbrooks BBQ sauce and Saxa salt over a bully beef stir fry in his corrugated iron roofed back block. "She made life pretty...

WestConnex protestor vows to keep pissing into the wind until the very end

6 July, 2016. 13:34 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact IN A SIMPLE CASE OF old hippies and new-to-the-block yuppies not wanting major progress to take place in their neighbourhood, the Sydneysiders protesting the controversial WestConnex project have agreed to keep getting piss on their chinos until the bitter end. Putting his art degree to the best use it's ever had, Newtown...

Dutton Blames Near Loss On Everything But His Track Record Of Human Rights Violations

5 July, 2016. 9:34 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contacts THE MINISTER FOR IMMIGRATION and Border Protection almost lost his north-west Brisbane seat over the weekend, which he's since blamed on a number of things that aren't his human rights track record. Peter Dutton has reportedly told journalists that union thugs, bikies and the Labor Party were all working to undermine his...

Casually Racist Voter Worried Pauline Hanson Isn’t As Casual As He Thought She Was

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact The extended family of Paul Abernathy (77) say that they were stunned to hear their casually racist grandfather condemn the popular Queensland senator Pauline Hanson this morning. "Jeez you know things are pretty messy when there is someone 'too racist' for our Pop" says grandson Michael (27). "He's usually the first to crack uncomfortable racist jokes and abuse offshore telemarketers... But...

Local man remains optimistic that this election might result in change

2 July, 2016. 13:34 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact IT'S THE SAME VICIOUS CYCLE every three years, except this time, he gets the opportunity to vote below the line. Because real change comes from voting below the line on the senate ballot paper. That's the opinion of one local inner eastern Betoota man, who got up early to beat the crowds at...

Local Man Gets His Dirty Little Mitts On Some Pill-Pressed Pingers Like It’s 2005

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact Local man, Thomas Trilby (28) has gotten his hands on some 2005 quality ecstasy tablets, it has been confirmed. After double checking with his dealer, Mr Trilby was informed that the $25 per unit deal was not an exaggeration, and that it was just like the old days. "I couldn't believe it. This guy must know some bikies...

Gold Coast Praised For Going 5 Months Without Racist Public Transport Incident

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Queensland's Gold Coast has been praised today by both minority groups and local politicians for managing to last 5 months without a video surfacing of a racist public transport incident. Gold Coast mayor, Tom Tate, says he is very proud of his city for not making national headlines over picking on random strangers on a...

Euthanasia becomes legal for people who drank prosecco the night before

29 June, 2016. 9:04 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact IF YOU'RE WAKING UP FROM a long hard night on the prosecco, there's some light at the end of the tunnel. Childbirth and femoral fractures are considered less painful than a hangover induced by the fancy-sounding fizzy pop - with some comparing it to having your head split in half with a...

Local dumb cunt opposes Gonski plan

29 June, 2016. 15:45 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact GREGOR MARTIN LIKES TO remain impartial politically, but he agrees that he can't stand idly by while a government spends his tax dollars on frivolities like the Gonski Plan. Penning an open letter to The Advocate, the 37-year-old lollipop man has voiced his outrage with both the incumbent government and the opposition...

Six years on, stockbrokers gather to remember and laugh about Occupy Sydney protests

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact JUST A WEEK OR TWO AFTER he was made a senior portfolio manager at his boutique Martin Place private asset management firm, Michael McAlister said he treated himself to a new suit. Not just any bit of common rag, this one was different. Sourced from the finest merino wool and stitched together by the most-skilled of...

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