The Nation

Dad’s Really Getting Into His Chutney

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A local dad has really been getting into making and taste-testing different types of chutney, it has been confirmed. What started as a kind of weird obsession with his chilli plants has turned into a much more problematic hobby. Chutney is a sauce in the cuisines of the Indian subcontinent that can include such forms as tomato and other fruit relish, a ground peanut garnish or a yogurt, cucumber and mint dip....

Smoking Returns To Pubs As High Court Reveals Every Law Passed Since 2005 Is Now Invalid

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The High Court has today suggested that the hundreds of laws voted on and passed by ineligible federal politicians, some who have been in power for over a decade, even count to anything any more The high court has ruled Barnaby Joyce, Fiona Nash, Larissa Waters, Scott Ludlam and Malcolm Roberts were ineligible to be elected. Matt Canavan and Nick Xenophon were found to be safe A...

Suburban Conveyancing Solicitor Not Comparing Himself To Rake Anymore

WENDELL HUSSEY | Intern | Contact Burwood solicitor Simon Harper has today distanced himself from his previous claims that he is a “bit of a Rake himself.” Despite the fact that, he doesn’t have anything in common with notable barrister and personality Charles Waterstreet, Harper has long described himself as a bit of a scoundrel. “Yeah, what can I say, I work hard. I play hard,...

Tony Jones Accidentally Refers To Magda As ‘Comrade’ In Slip Of Tongue During Q&A

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Actress and same-sex marriage advocate Magda Szubanski has come out today to clear her name from any involvement in the Australian Communist Party, after ABC Q&A host Tony Jones accidentally referred to her as 'comrade' in the heat of last night's discussion. The term 'comrade' which has been common in both the left-wing Australian union movements and communist...

Police Called After Dad Serves Up Leftover Apricot Chicken For Dinner

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT Two police squad teams answered an urgent call from a South Betoota home at 7:14 PM where it has been confirmed, dad, Leslie Jones, served up leftover apricot chicken for dinner. Crowds gathered in front of the Burra Street home as the police resolved a domestic dispute, which involved the sounds of childrens’ screams and alleged stamping of...

Thai Restaurant Matriarch Scans Diners Head-To-Toe Before Deciding Where To Sit Them

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT An efficient and assertive floor manager at a prominent Thai restaurant has made it clear that if you want to eat, you will sit where you are told to sit. While there seems to be a few other customers around, it's not exactly as crammed as it would be at the lunch rush peak hour, but Mrs Rojumanong is not...

Local Girl Loving The ‘Time Capsule’ Playlist Spotify Violated Her Privacy To Create

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT Sally Epstein (25) started her Thursday morning commute to the delightful sight of a personalised Time Capsule playlist that Spotify created just for her by closely examining her private information. While supposedly aware about how companies examine her online usage, age, geography, conversation sentiment, social network, Google searches and more, Epstein appears to be too smitten with the...

Nan Shocks Nation With Coherent Answer On Family Feud

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT After an abysmal third round that saw the Wright family strike three incorrect answers in a row, Nana Val shocked us all by returning a coherent and well thought out answer to the difficult question the Carter family faced. “I thought we were gone!” Team leader and son of Nana in question, George Carter was at a complete...

John Howard Says The Boys Are Looking Fucken Deadly In That New Blackfella Jersey

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT As the clock strikes half-time on the third match of the 2017 Bledisloe Cup between New Zealand and Australia, the neck and neck score is just as exciting as the new and improved Indigenous-themed jerseys, according to John Howard. The jersey, which was designed by Sydney artist Dennis Golding, outlines fourteen symbols on that serve to commemorate the...

Woody Harrelson Confirmed To Play Kerrod Walters In Wayne Bennett Biopic

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Clint Eastwood has been confirmed as the lead actor and director of the upcoming feature film based on the life of iconic Queensland rugby league coach Wayne Bennett, he joins a number of other high-profile actors in the biopic - including Woody Harrelson, who is believed to have approached Eastwood himself and demanded he play the role...

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