Local News

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact "I'm so going to get you to defend me if I get done for DUI or something, how funny would that be?" That's the fourth time Alice Munro has been told that since she posed with her parents for a photograph out the front of the Queensland Supreme Court in Brisbane late last year, admission...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact In the ultimate act of disrespect, a South Betoota man has struggled to keep a straight face this afternoon after handing his visiting cousin a bootleg, nigh-on-unusable Nintendo 64 controller as the pair sat down to enjoy a quick game of Blast Corps before tea. Levon Danko popped in from nearby Windorah earlier today and called in to see...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact With his fellow housemates at the forefront of his thoughts, a popular mortgage broker wandered home last night from the Pingouin Aveugle Bar & Grill in the French Quarter when he spied something he thought his friends would like. As this morning was the first of four shire council cleanup services this year, the footpaths and roadsides of the...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Along with his 3-foot wallet chain and pork pie hat, a local rude boy's slip-on checkerboard Vans have sat idle in his wardrobe for a number of years now - waiting for Ska music's next inevitable revival. It was 1999 and Western society was teetering on the edge of collapse. The threat of communism was replaced...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The music industry is reeling today from the findings of a decade-long study into two of it's biggest names. For many years now, many insiders have long suspected US rock bands Kings of Leon and The Killers are actually the same band. Earlier this afternoon, the music industry's peak scientific body, PitchGronk, published the controversial study...

Betoota’s trendy French Quarter has been the sight of an audible tantrum today as local graphic designer Marcus Marigold (34) received a flat white with just enough foam that he believed he’d instead been served a latte. The resulting tantrum took place at approximately 8:30 am in the ‘Wolf & Brew Haberdashery’ with witnesses describing Marigold’s reaction as outraged and...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact “Get a haircut c-nt” was the phrase still ringing through Marcus Harrison’s head this morning as he trundled down to his local barber. After being berated for an entire Saturday by a middle aged father of 3, Harrison decided that maybe it was time he cut his hair. “Yeah, standing in the baking sun fielding all day is often...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A small child spoke freely with The Advocate yesterday during a local wedding, saying he'd had enough and wanted to go home. Sam Allison (9) told our reporter, who was also present at the wedding, that he'd been up since the 'early morning' and was beginning to get fed up with the whole thing. "I'm so...

DEIDRE DOBSON | Travel | Contact A resident of the leafy, exclusive enclave of Betoota Grove has confirmed to his 700 Instagram followers that today is definitely a day for it. Will St Germaine (26), a French Quarter real estate agent, has amassed a strong following on the app thanks to his constant confirmations of whether it is or is not a...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Try as the might, the Inter is bogged. Rather than face the ultimate humiliation and get Dad to come and help you, two local brothers attempted to save face today and get Big Red out of a bog by themselves - but both of them knew their efforts were futile. After a few scuds passed through...