With a state election campaign currently underway, news reading mainlanders have received a timely reminder that Tasmania is in fact real.

At the time of writing, Tasmania is billions of dollars in debt with the highest youth unemployment, a healthcare system on the brink of collapse and a community housing system with backlogs in the thousands, it’s about time that someone stood up and listened to what Tasmanians really want.

When that didn’t happen the half a million Tasmanians were asked one more time if they are definitely sure they don’t want a shiny new multi-million dollar stadium instead.

Although half the island is happy to kick the Sherrin around on gravel, a Hobart stadium has long been a Tasmanian pipe dream, a high speed rail of the south that gets dragged out every time some bureaucrat wants to create 12 jobs whilst getting richer themselves. 

Although the island is host to one of the most vile genocides, an extinct state icon and some of the most extreme cost of living pressures, the AFL decided Tasmania has not suffered enough and will soon be starting an Aussie Rules team there.

With this AFL team on the way, a Hobart stadium seems like a real thing the Tassie government actually might spend money on with a lot of the state election talk being about the stadium which has caused NSW to send a cease and desist.

“The new stadium will not cost $715 million,” stated Tassie premier Jeremy Rockliff when asked about a healthcare workers shortage.

“It will cost $375 million, private sector investments will pick up the shortfall, that’s how these things work, corporations are here to help.”

The Advocate was unable to obtain any quotes from real Tasmanians about a potential new stadium as all individuals asked were either sick of talking about it or used language too explicit to print as they explained how they just wanted something to fill the potholes that wasn’t road kill.



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