The interstate battle for local tourist dollars continues to heat up this week, as South Australia announces bold plans to bring the 2028 solar eclipse to Radelaide.

Off the back of last weekend’s LIV golf spectacle, which saw The Grange Golf Club host what looked like the world’s biggest bucks party, the South Australian tourism board has stated it’s keen to bring the total eclipse to the city of murders and churches.

In a press pack out the front of Adelaide Observatory in Modbury Heights, South Australian Premier Peter Malinauskas appeared shirtless with glittery moon stickers covering his nipples, as he made the announcement.

“I believe we’ve shown these past few years that no other state does big events like South Australia,” said Premier Malinauskas.

“From hosting the State of Origin and the AFL’s Gather Round and now the LIV tournament, it’s clear South Australia is the tourism capital of Oz, and that’s why we’re making plans to bring the big eclipse down to Adelaide!”

When quizzed on the technicalities of the arrangement, given that geographical and celestial cartography would argue the 2028 eclipse will be best viewed from the Kimberley in WA, Malinauskas said the state government was willing to bargain hard with the other states and territories to get their way.

Asked why he was appearing shirtless, Premier Malinauskas said it was all about making sure the announcement would pick up as much click bait as possible on mastheads around the country.

“I’m willing to do whatever I can to remind Australians that Adelaide exists and it’s a great place to visit,” said Premier Malinauska whilst preparing to do a shoey of local wine with his boot.

“Here, give this Shiraz a go and tell me you wouldn’t want to sip it while watching the eclipse from the Barossa Valley, while the Hilltop Hoods play a set in the background!”

“It’ll be a once in a lifetime show!”


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here