ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

Looking back through the marijuana smog to a simpler time when domestic arguments were settled with the Xbox and life was chopped up in days, not billable hours, a local city worker recalled a time when he was most free but at the same time, he failed to remember the devon logs that kept alive.

When Lucas Paddock presented himself to an on-campus GP back in the glory days with sore gums and a sickly Melbourne pallor, the doctor was shocked and somewhat appalled to diagnose the stubborn Leo with scurvy – a mouth disease the GP hadn’t seen since his placement in Papua New Guinea some 30 years before.

However, that’s not what comes to mind when the 29-year-old thinks back to his halcyon days of being a ‘big dog on campus’.

“Fuck man, I’d do anything to go back to those days,” said the corporate lawyer.

“The drinking, the partying and the chickie babes. Living in sharehouses back then was loose as fuck, man. Like smoking inside, a Gatorade bong in the laundry. I remember doing dots off the stove like I was an extra in Once Were Warriors!”

“I haven’t woke up at 2pm since. Now that I’ve got bills to pay, responsibilities to live up to. A dog. Not that I’m complaining now, it’s just that those days were great.”

In the 40 minute conversation young Lucas had with our reporter, not once did he mention the fact that his diet almost exclusively was devon, white bread and perhaps a squirt of tomato sauce or the Rolls-Royce of sandwich condiments, mango chutney.

Our reporter thought that was odd – but not as odd as interviewing somebody about a devon addiction they have almost a decade ago.

And with that, our reporter clicked the recorder off and excused himself from the conversation.

More to come.


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