ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

Under-siege religious figure Israel Folau tried to distract himself from the growing media storm around him by taking his late-model Lamborghini for a spin.

Sadly, the half-million-dollar Italian sportscar’s coil pack had shit itself and the thing wouldn’t go.

In a rare interview with the media, Mr Folau spoke briefly with The Advocate via telephone where he told our reporters that its lucky he left so much extra room in his fundraising efforts for unexpected things like this.

“Thank the Lord,” he said.

“Do you know how much a coil pack costs for a Lamborghini? I don’t but I’m about to find out! Far too much for an unemployed man, regardless,”

“But I’m glad I left some living expenses in my crowdfunding campaign. Who would’ve thought? Such a bad time for the coil pack to shit itself when I’m between jobs. But it’s obviously part of God’s plan so I’m not worried.”

Mr Folau then laughed at his own joke and hung up the phone.

More to come.


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