LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT

Peter Dutton (48) has defended his nearly half a million dollars in personal expenses today, stating it is not easy for him to get people to join him for dinner.

Dutton explained it was necessary for him to rack up $450,000 worth of dinners and drinks, wining and dining people who would have never had a meal with him unless Dutton (and the taxpayers) offered to foot the bill.

“I know it sounds like a lot but it’s not as much as you’d think because we went to these pretty pricey places,” stated Dutton in his native parseltongue.

“We have to go to top of the line places.”

One such dinner guest of Dutton, who would prefer to remain anonymous, stated they had dinner at a hatted restaurant where the MP requested a bottle of Vatican I era red wine out of his preferred goblet which he had brought with him from home.

“He kept asking me if I’d vote for him when he became PM. He didn’t even eat his food, he just stared at it as if he was trying to make it move with his mind.”

When asked about the evening in question, Dutton stated he remembered that and cited it as one of the happiest nights of his life.

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