In yet another example of why we actually need a competent Federal Government that isn’t obsessed with photoshoots and culture wars, it seems Cybercriminals have now stolen the private date of Medibank customers.

If we hadn’t already learned from the Optus data breach, it seems that Australia’s cybersecurity laws and software is well behind the rest of the world, mostly because our politicians have spent the last ten years debating whether or not gay people can fall in love.

In a move that experts say appears to be designed to “incite fear” – the hackers have released sensitive details of customers’ medical procedures and said it had demanded $US1 ($1.60) for each of Medibank’s 9.7 million customers.

Medibank has confirmed that the personal information of more than 5 million customers has been released so far, after these dumbarse suits tried to play hard ball.

The sickening implications of this extremely private information being plastered around the dark web runs a lot deeper than corporate Australia is willing to acknowledge, with millions of Australians now forced to revisit their most traumatic and mortal moments.

The shrinking community of Australian medical skeptics are also rather concerned about the inconvenient truths this breach might reveal.

This is because vaccination histories are also on the list of the leaked data, exposing a number of Australians that might’ve actually listened to the advice of doctors at some point in their lives.

This terrifying exposè has since resulted in a counter-misinformation campaign from the Anti-vaxxer movement, who are now claiming that the Medibank Data Breach is a conspiracy aimed at discrediting them.

Mullumbimby-based naturopath Delilah Clementè says that if anyone sees anything about her medical history on the internet, just remember it’s all lies.

“I have avoided polio and smallpox using my own IMMUNE SYSTEM, not one the world’s most successful medical practices” she said.

“It’s not even hackers leaking this information. Everyone knows this data leak has come from the ABC’s Dr Norman Swan who is trying to make us look lie traitors.

“It’s all bullshit. Why would Medibank even have my data? Why would I pay for liar insurance???”

“I don’t know how yet… But I bet Dan Andrews is involved”


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