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The curator of Wellington’s Basin Reserve has told The Advocate that he has prepared a slower deck for tomorrow Test Match in order to pacify the Australian pace attack.

For the past two seasons, the Australian Cricket Team has been spearheaded by the bowling of captain Pat Cummins, Mitchell Starc, Josh Hazelwood and Cameron Green. It’s been the base for the team’s success and along with the criticially handy bowling of Nathan Lyon, it’s seen the team rise to the very top of the Test cricket rankings.

The batting has been average at best, which is where curator Gordon McIntyre sees an opportunity to level the playing field.

“I’ve, ah, left a bit of green pick on the wicket and instead of the heavy roller, I’ve just spend the afternoon walking on the pitch a bit,” he said.

“We’ve also spent this week knocking together so sight screens because the Aussies got upset when they learned we didn’t have any and that we didn’t really believe in the science behind them and so on but yes, it’s been prepared to be a slow wicket. I’ve had to send my son Jerry into town to get some more petrol for the Victa so we can do the rest of the outfield tonight. My nephew Roy is coming this afternoon to get his wethers off the pitch,”

“There’s still a lot of work to be done here. We need to put ice in the chilly bins, put out the boundary rope. Sweep all the sheep shit off the pitch. You know, you’ll like this, we went down to Rebel in town this morning to buy some stumps and they didn’t have any. So we’ve had Roy make some with the legs off his granny, my mother’s dinner table. She passed a few years ago now and I’m sure she wouldn’t mind but her sister Robyn would be having kittens,”

“Royboy took them into the local school and borrowed the lathe and carved them down. They’re pretty much all the same length but if we break one tomorrow, we’ll just have to have either an imaginary middle stump or we’ll have to pop one of the chilly bins out there,”

“Either way, I hope the uptown Aussie boys are happy. We’ve had a working bee all week getting everything ready for this match.”

More to come.


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