EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact

A group of party animals have today tried to figure out which housemate applicants are ‘fun’, through a series of well thought, subtle questions to gauge a willingness to party.

It’s alleged residents on Betoota’s infamous Daroo street recently parted ways with one of the O.G. roommates, who’d they’d lived with since graduating highschool. As Dave had just received a job offer in Newcastle, the rest of the crew were tasked with finding an adequate replacement – though it would be hard, considering Dave’s dad owned a brewery and they got free beer all the time.

On top of missing his company, the household is also faced with the difficult task of getting someone who not only likes to have a pissup on the weekend, but enjoys a smoke or two – or at least, had no issue with them doing it in the house.

This has included denying any applicant that mentioned the word ‘clean’ more than once and anyone that looked or sounded like a square, resulting in a reasonably effective screening process to progress applicants to the second round – meeting in person.

For today’s potential roomie, the crew are interviewing a twenty something girl named Izzie, who they thought could be cool as she has a septum piercing.

“So, what do you do on the weekend?”, asks Damien.

“Probably just go out with friends, maybe spend a Sunday on the beach.”

“Oh yep, like to a bar or clubbing?”

“Yeah I sometimes go clubbing, don’t mind a bit of a dance.”

Trying to figure out if she was talking about clubbing or clubbing clubbing, Georgie comes in with the big guns.

“Clubbing is so dangerous for me, I usually don’t get home until 5am haha.”

“Then I find it so hard to sleep so I have to unwind for like, another hour.”

“You know what I mean?”

More to come.


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