Some Betoota Base Hospital medical students have revealed to The Advocate this week how they like to unwind after a big day in the ward – and it might shock you.

Speaking to our reporter who was picking something up from the dodgy bloke in the group, the students spoke candidly about why they were jabbing shit into their arms.

“Oh, we are just practice cannulation,” laughed one of the students (who have all requested anonymity) with a needle poking out of her skin.

Cannulas are tubes that are inserted into the body, often for the delivery or removal of fluid, and can be particularly tricky to get right.

With the group huddled around an array of pinched medical supplies, they explained that it’s actually really difficult to put cannulas in, especially when you haven’t had any experience other than on lifeless dummies.

“So we just practice on ourselves, you probably wouldn’t get it cause you aren’t in Med [haha],” said another student.

“Consider it an informal OSCE, that we run ourselves.”

“Oh you wouldn’t get OSCE either [haha].”

“Sorry, it’s just like a fancy name for tests we do.”

Our reporter grimaced and nodded politely.

“Besides, cannulation can be really handy for hangovers, when we just rig up a handy little saline drip. Works like magic.”

“You’ve just got make sure you cover up all the stab marks in your arms and hands.”

Our reporter nodded one last time and walked out.

No more to come.


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