EFFIE BATEMAN Lifestyle Contact

A local bloke has found himself having a mini meltdown in his car this morning, after a chirpy radio host had the audacity to remind him of his mortality.

James Herston [35] tells The Advocate that he’d been simply minding his own fucking business driving to work when he’d switched on the tradie radio, also known as Triple M, praying to god that they wouldn’t play Foo Fighters for the 50th time that morning. Unfortunately, his desire to hear one of his favourite bands was to include a bit of a swipe from the twenty something host, who called it….classic rock.

“I thought classic rock was still AC DC or Guns ‘N Roses?”, wails James, “but apparently it includes Linkin Park now?”

“…fuck I miss Chester, man. Him and Avicii really fucked me up.”

“Am I that old?”

Burrowing his face into his hands, James says it got exponentially worse, as the line of ‘classic rock’ songs started to evolve into nu metal.

“It started playing System of a Down, so I had to pull over to the side of the road and collect myself for a bit”, James admits, “I’m not even a dad, why is this happening to me?”


More to come.


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