ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
A popular part-time crew trainer at the Daroo Street McDonald’s Family Restaurant has revealed to The Advocate that he sneaks extra McNuggets into customer’s orders because he’s community-minded and ‘fast-food Robin Hood’.
Douglas Milton, a 24-year-old student at the South Betoota Polytechnic College, said he rounds up to the nearest ten when he puts together a McNugget order then explains the discrepancy in stock by writing it up as wastage.
However, when asked by our reporters if he had any ill-will toward his employer, the happy-go-lucky Gemini said he didn’t – but stopped short of saying he enjoyed his job.
“What I like most about my role here at McDonald’s is that I’m able to give back to the community by ripping off an immoral, faceless, global corporation,” he said.
“I’m 90% sure my boss knows about my little scheme but at the end of the day, I don’t think he cares. But yeah, I know how much joy finding an extra McNugget or seven can bring someone, which I why I get such a good feeling doing it,”
“Yes, I will keep doing it. I’ll keep doing it until the day I leave this place. I’m not sorry for causing a small loss to McDonald’s, which pays fuck all corporate tax in Australia anyway, to make somebody’s day.”
The Advocate put the call out to the residents surrounding the Daroo Street institution, especially those who frequent the McDonald’s to see if any could corroborate Mr Milton’s claims.
There were thousands of replies.
Jenny Porterhouse, a receptionist at the local Department of Primary Industries office, said she often helps herself to a 10-pack of McNuggets on the way home as a special treat.
Just yesterday, she found 24 chicken McNuggets crammed into her small 10-pack box.
“I was blown away,” she said.
“When the lady handed me the bag through the drive-through window, I could feel the weight of it and felt something was awry. But I didn’t wait around to ask,”
“I gunned my little Echo around the corner, squeeking the tyres, into the French Quarter Business Park and opened the bag. I was gobsmacked. The bag was almost full of nuggets. I thought I was going to pass out from sheer ecstasy. But now I know,”
“I’m glad people like Douglas exist in the world. They’re titans walking amongst us.”
More to come.