The Queensland Premier Steven Miles has this week rejected the 60-day review into the 2032 Olympics preparations, which his own government appointed former Brisbane mayor Graham Quirk to conduct in January amid concerns about the cost.

The review, which was released on Monday, recommended replacing the plans to Gabba rebuild plan, which is likely to cost $3 billion, with a new “greenfield” stadium at Victoria Park that would somehow cost of up to $3.4 billion.

In what could easily be just another case of inner-city self-importance, The Queensland Government has met endless backlash for their plan to build the 2032 Olympics site in the central and urban Gabba – location that has adequate public transport options – and will provide the city with a sporting precinct that will get plenty of use in the future.

This overthinking echoes the NSW Premier Bob Carr’s last minute decision to ditch plans to build a Sydney Olympics site with three CBD sporting stadiums in Barangaroo, and instead settle on tearing down the old Homebush abbattoirs in an effort to win votes from outer-Sydney tradies.

While the Homebush experiment was built on time, and worked well enough for the 2000 games, it now means Sydney is destined to a lifetime of traffic jams and cancelled trains, as the city navigates the logistical nightmare that comes with travelling to an inaccessible and culturally devoid shit-hole that now hosts the big football matches and Taylor Swift concerts.

In return, for this pain, the city of Sydney was gifted James Packer’s high-rollers casino on the inner-city site that had initially been earmarked for what could have been the greatest harbourside sporting precinct in the world.

With less than ten years to go, it’s looking like the hysterically NIMBY anti-Gabba Olympics minority might cause enough drama that the Brisbane games suffer from both outer-suburban inaccessibility and unfinished construction.

However, Premier Miles has said today quelled all concerns that the Olympics preparations will run behind schedule, assuring Queenslanders that if he can’t get the Gabba over the line, he’s got the perfect and most logical alternative location up his sleeve.

“Archerfield” he said.

“You know the one, ’bout 45 minutes from the CBD”

“Well, it turns out they’ve been asking for help renovating the joint. I’ve said maybe we can help. It just means that this venue will also have to host the Olympic 400m finals as well as the monster trucks and rodeos”


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