42-year-old migrant Alina Khandelwal has reportedly been practicing her responses to hypothetical questions about Australia Day in anticipation of a TV journalist accosting her on the street to get her soundbite in ‘hit the streets’ style news report.

Alina, a foreign born Australian , has taken it upon herself to be well-prepared for the moment when a TV news crew inevitably charges towards her for an impromptu interview about the immigrant experience on the controversial national holiday.

Sources close to Alina reveal that she has been rehearsing her responses to questions such as, “How does Australia Day make you feel as an immigrant?” and “Do you think the celebration is inclusive enough?”

“I’ve got to be ready for these things, you know? I know a lot of Australians are very touchy about this bizarre holiday that has no real ceremony attached to it other than getting drunk. I really just don’t want to upset anyone.” Alina says.

“I was very shocked people actually took the day so seriously when I came here, where I was born we celebrate the arrival of our religion to the lands 2000 years ago, there is a lot of tradition and every hour of the day is accounted for.”

While Alina remains nonchalant about the day as a whole, she does admit she’s fearful of any backlash from mainstream Australia when she is inevitably approached on the the street by a man with a microphone asking for her opinion, because apparently her opinion is more relevant that the captain of the national cricket side.

Local beer drinking true blue Aussie bloke, Aaron Phillips (44), reckons Alina’s opinion is extremely important, because he believes it has the power to override the Indigenous perspective.

Plus he wants to know if the migrants are gracious, or if they are taking HIS generosity for granted.

“The Australian public needs to know if she’s one of the good ones or not” he says.

“If she doesn’t value January the 26th… Then what else doesn’t she value about this great country?”

“People need to respect this nation that my grandparents moved to because it was so cheap and had better weather than England”


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