Local News

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact If it's not broke, don't fix it. That's the message that the community is getting from the Betoota Heights Ultimate Frisbee Association (BHUFA) today after breaking the news that champion speed skater Steven Bradbury is returning to their annual luncheon as guest speaker. For the third year in a row. Speaking exclusively to The Advocate this morning ahead of the July...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Despite his best effort, Damien Cottonwell didn't get much rest last night. A heavy Carbonnara dinner; he even used full fat cream. "I know it's not the traditional recipe but I was feeling naughty," he explained to The Advocate this morning. "But I was hunting a good night's sleep so I had a huge dinner and went to bed early....

TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture| CONTACT Betoota’s top drug dealer, Jyleigh Barron, has been elusive to local police for the 10 years. Always seemingly 2 steps ahead of them. That was until he bought himself a ten-year-old BMW M3. It isn’t this particular car that gave Jayden away, it was the fact that he decided to apply a matte finish to the exterior of the...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A group of five girlfriends have been told to shut the fuck up this evening, because Hayley is back in the game. While catching up for their bi-monthly girls dinner, the group of girls who make up a fusion of both work and high school friends, have got some serious goss to sink their teeth into. Most notably, the fact...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet |Contact Oliver Braddon has assured The Advocate this morning that he could stop gambling literally anytime he felt like it. The 27-year-old solicitor at Adams & Adams in the French Quarter, who would reportedly bet on two flies walking up a wall, sat down with our reporters to outline why his girlfriend’s concerns are unfounded. Braddon, who bet on over 7.5 corners to occur in the 10...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A recent report by everyone at a Schultz family barbecue has found that Uncle Boof might have been carrying on over the last few months. Last thought to be working FIFO in Moranbah, Uncle Boof has been flying under the radar for a while now, and it doesn't sound like he's been seeing much of Kath and his kids. When...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact If fourth-grade suburban rugby league is the sport of kings - Paddy O'Connor is certainly the crown price of the local competition. Either that or court jester - according to those who play with the swashbuckling 29-year-old prop forward. Case in point being at a forwards gym and drill session down the Dolphins Leagues Club this morning, says his long-suffering...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A local nail salon in Betoota's inner-city suburb of Roma Hills has been rated as a solid 9.5/10, judging solely off the smell. ToP pOLiSh can be found at the the sixth left-hand shopfront in the grimey Roma Arcade, just between the RTA and the prominent Australianised Chinese Restaurant, Red Lotus. While no one you know has actually gotten their...

TRACEY BENDINGER | Society | Contact Betoota Hills robot, Colin Dominican (29) thought his newish life partner, Sandra Wentworth (28), had it all going for her. She was hot, funny, loved footy and getting around his mates - in his eyes she was perfect. That was until they decided to have a weekend away together at the Diamantina Resort, 4hrs North of...

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT A Betoota Ponds wedding has been saved from being a completely lacklustre affair with the DJ deciding to whack on the Grease Medley Megamix and crank it up to 11. According to wedding DJ Walter Casey (54) he doesn’t usually smash the Grease Medley Megamix until later in the evening but upon seeing what an uptight and sorrid...