IN-Focus

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A new report commissioned by the nation's peak scientific body has concluded that it's almost always the people who'd be among the first to die from the super spicy cough that wants it to be let loose on society at large. Australians such as Clive Palmer and George Christensen, who've both been openly ridiculed in...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The Prime Minister responded to claims made by a group of international leaders that humanity is facing a 'code red emergency' when it comes to climate change. Responding, Scott Morrison explained that the popular international policy to reach net-zero carbon emissions by 2050 is completely irrelevant and pointless because most of his government - and...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Devices used to blast faeces from the bleached arseholes of Byron residents have been stripped from supermarket shelves throughout the Northern Rivers today as the so-called lockdown begins across the region. The hottest item in the area is a personal bidet, according to data provided by Woolworths and the countless residents of the area taking...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The West Australian Parliament has been plunged into chaos this afternoon as the State’s Premier Mark McGowan admitted to being in a medium-risk jurisdiction. Mark McGowan told police and media today that back in 1968, he was in New South Wales. New South Wales was declared a 'medium-risk' jurisdiction by the WA Government back in 1935...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The Sydney Sneeze has jumped the fence and is now coursing through the veins and arteries of regional NSW, which had their fancy Michelle Pfieffer jabs stolen by the government to give to Year 12 students in the 8 LGAs in Sydney that have gone to shit. In response to that, people from affected communities...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The Premier of Victoria Dan Andrews has asked his mid-northern counterparts to please put a fucking ring of steel around Sydney because it's fucking everything up for the rest of the country. "Can you please put a fucking fence around your stupid fucking city," Andrews told media in Melbourne this afternoon. "Please, for fuck's sake. How...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A future leader of this country has thanked the NSW Premier today for making sure he and his family are safe from the horrible plague that God has set upon us all. Michael Patches-O'Pooley, an 18-year-old student at one of those fucking schools and who's probably some important Sydney cunt's son or something, told...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The faint slap of half-digested cheeseboard and white wine hitting the lawns of Hunter Valley wineries will not be heard for some time as the region goes into lockdown. That's forced the organiser of a hen's weekend to find another wine region to get blackout drunk in. Betoota Heights woman, Megan Taylor, explained to The Advocate...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The New South Wales Government has set this horrible plague upon regional areas this week in exchange for their only line of defence from it. Premier Gladys Berejiklian and the glorified handbag stand that moonlights as the state's Health Minister told people in the bush that they weren't as important as Year 12 students in...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The government has issued some good news today for the nation's young people, saying they might have access to the Pfizer jab before too long. In just a few weeks, Australia will be awash with jabs of all varieties. That's the message from Prime Minister Scott Morrison as he spoke to reporters in Canberra. "Our research...