ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

In a rare joint statement, former Prime Ministers Tony Abbott, Malcolm Turnbull and Scott Morrison have called on the nation’s young people to keep blaming the Reserve Bank and their stupid boomer parents for destroying the housing market and crushing any dreams they had of attaining their version of the Australian Dream.

The statement was received in the form of a press release from Mr Turnbull’s Ozemail account and detailed how they are being scapegoated by “mean-spirited people of social media” for things that they simply aren’t to blame for.

“In recent weeks,” the statement began.

“We have read commentary that the former Coalition Governments are the architects of the current cost of living crisis and intergenerational housing affordability problems. We, the leaders of those governments, categorically deny those allegations. Our governments provided the tools for Australians who were having a read hot crack to get ahead. In the immortal words of Scott Morrison, if you had a go, you got a go,”

“Our governments made it easy for people to generate wealth. If you weren’t able to do it yourself then you weren’t having a go. It’s a simple as that. For people to turn around and blame Tony, Malcolm and Scott for their problems is near-sighted and ignorant of fact,”

“Blame the Reserve Bank, who threw the burley out that began the feeding frenzy. Blame the Baby Boomers for being greedy money pigs. Blame the ‘mouth-breathing tradies’ that you laughed at for dropping out of school to go be a diesel mechanic in Kalgoorlie, only to become you and your friends’ landlord twenty years later. They had a go and they got one. Our tax policy and sensible monetary management created the environment to made bulk cash. If you didn’t take advantage of that, that’s your fault,”

“Suck eggs. Signed TA MT SM.”

The statement has been widely condemned by media and political commentators alike. Some have labelled the rambling, incoherent block of text as “dangerous” and “completely false”.

More to come.

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