LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT

As The Nationals party begins to feel some sense of normality again, their party summit in Gundagai (aka Rock the Riverina) has been shaken by the arrival of boisterous new MP known only as Mrs Joycefire.

During George Christensen’s Warren Truss impersonation, Mrs Joycefire stormed the stage, snatching the microphone, before proceeding to roast Christensen.

It is believed most of the jokes were centred around the incel MPs weight, stating the only woman waiting for him at home is Mrs Mac.

The alleged insults were reportedly met with raucous laughter and applause before Mrs Joycefire took aim at the entire branch of the WA Nationals, stating they had as much power as “a group of soft-handed, half-baked Lismore Greens.”

Following the roast Mrs Joycefire proceeded to lead the party in a 12-minute-long extended version of The Nutbush

Unconfirmed reports state Mrs Joycefire later quipped the dance was the most exercise Christensen would get this year.

Nationals party leader Michael McCormack says this year’s summit was the best of his career, stating that Mrs Joycefire was certainly the bell of the ball.

“I haven’t enjoyed myself this since I was downing West Coast Coolers as an 18-year-old with Mark Vaile in a Cootamundra woolshed. Fark, Joycefire is a real card, I wonder if there’s a seat for her on the front bench?”

“Or on my lap!”

MORE TO COME.

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