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A krav maga, kickboxing and UFC enthusiast named Klay Wilson (28) sat down with The Advocate to explain why you’d have to be pretty fucked in the head go even look at him.

The topless park goer, with a couple of piss weak tattoos on his back, said that he enjoys coming down to the Euston Park in the Golf Course Estate to work out.

“Yeah, it’s nice to get out of the gym you know. Get down here to the park and just work myself out a little bit,” he said whilst slowly swaying back and forth.

“Yeah I pull a few reverse kicks, and some other manoeuvres down here.”

“There’s no point me really listing them cause you wouldn’t know the technical names and stuff (sic),” the sales rep at Harvey Norman said.

Wilson said that anyone making eye contact when he was working out was asking for trouble.

“Yeah, if I’m going flat out making all the utz utz noses and everything, and someone starts staring at me, who knows what I might do,” he said.

“I don’t even know what I’m capable of.”

Fellow park goer, Reece Mason told us that he’s noticed Wilson down here a few times.

“He saunters around like he’s about to step into the octagon. He just looks like a moron doesn’t he,” Mason said.

“I doubt he could knock the skin off the rice pudding to be honest with you”

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