ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
Assuring the customer that the machine is not broken and after the customer blamed the bank, a local bartender’s heart has been warmed thoroughly seeing a terrible person’s credit card be repeatedly declined before his eyes.
Martin Cornhole clicked his fingers until Sam McKendy turned around and started to serve him.
“That was when I discovered he was a cunt,” said Sam, a food and beverage professional at a small Betoota Links craft brewery.
“Then he ordered drinks that are an absolute cunt to make. Two expresso [sic] martinis, a Guinness and two Margaret River shirazs, iced,”
“I know it’s my job to make drinks and put a bullshit smile on my face all day when inside I feel like beating half the customers to death with a length of reo bar, I’m also human,”
“So when this chinless 50-something burlap sack of human filth threw me, threw me the cunt, his American Express and it came up declined, I just fucking melted inside. Like a bar of Xanax and bottle of red type internal melting. It was fucking all-time, mate.”
From there, Mr Cornhole made Sam punch in the credit card number into the terminal. Still to no avail.
Then after it was declined for the 6th time, they tried another card. Declined.
Defeated, Martin asked another person in his party to pay for the drinks on the proviso his cards weren’t working.
“Him and I both know that he’s a fucking poser deadbeat,”
“But fuck, mate. There’s nothing better for a bartender than seeing a wanker customer having his card declined.”
More to come.