In a groundbreaking declaration that has sent shockwaves throughout the diplomatic community, a stoned uni kid watching tiktok videos of violence in the middle east has revealed the solution to end the generational conflict raging overseas, is to simply chill out.

Will Chester (22), A man that isn’t really into the news and is more of a ‘back of the newspaper kind of guy’, as he says, has recently noticed some things going on in the Middle East.

“I don’t really know anything about what’s going on but it’s hectic hey?”  Will proclaimed.

With an unprecedented escalation to the violence in Israel and Palestine not seen since the 90s and saber rattling coming from regional powers on both sides of the conflict, it seems like peace in the region is further away than it has ever been in our lifetime, but Will sees things differently.

“Like, I really just think everyone needs to chill out a bit” he says.

Although Will has zero knowledge in the conflict and repeatedly referenced the South Asian nation of Afghanistan as though it is somehow in the same region as this conflict, he remains committed to his peace deal.

“Like seriously” he says.

While Will’s answer to solving this highly complicated ethno-religious tug of war that has been unfolding over several decades has left reporters baffled, one thing is certain, there’s not going to be any less conflict until at least someone chills out.

It’s still not yet known if Will’s ideas have reached the chambers of the Knesset, or the United Nations, but some of Will’s other stoner mates definitely agree.

“He has a point to be honest, I can’t lie.” Said one of Will’s mates, who is also stoned.


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