22 September, 2016. 15:00


Recently single Hollywood superstar, Angelina Jolie, didn’t appear too heartbroken by her imminent divorce to third husband Brad Pitt overnight.

The 41-year-old was seen leaving a high end LA restuarant last night with a man who is rumoured to be her newest sexual conquest, Australian spin bowler Shane Keith Warne.

Warne, who has in the past dated Liz Hurley and Simone Warne, looked fighting fit and ready for the task at hand.

“It’s been quite an, umm, journey for me” Jolie told the predatory papparazzi.

“He has… quite alot of (sic) stamina”

Yesterday it was revealed the Angelina Jolie had filed for a divorce from Brad Pitt and had requested full physical custody of their six children. It is not yet known what caused this seperation, but Warnie says he couldn’t give a shit.

“Not sure what’s going on” Warnie told the media outside the restaurant.

“Met her on Tinder after a charity match in Beverley Hills. She’s the chick from Tomb Raider aye”

During their twelve-year relationship, Pitt and Jolie were known as “Brangelina”—a portmanteau coined by TMZ entertainment media. This morning, the New York Times coined a new name “ShaneGelina”.

It is not known how long Shanegelina will last – with many close to Jolie terrified that she might experience heart break in the near future as the King Of Spin gets to know Hollywood.

For more Warnie-related news, go here



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