16 November, 2016. 13:23

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

MOVE OVER NEW SOUTH WALES and Victoria, there’s a new smart kid in class – and they’re here to stay.

Queensland premier Annastacia Palaszczuk announced plans today to reintroduce the long-loved ‘Smart State’ number plates that former premier Peter Beattie championed in 2003, despite the state voting in two One Nation senators at the last election.

That and areas of Ipswich and parts of the Brisbane – Gold Coast corridor having literacy and numeracy rates that are on par with some rural districts of Somalia.

Palaszczuk’s plan has been met with ridicule online, which has prompted the politician to hit back at the trolls.

“Many of Australia’s most intellegent [sic] people have come out of Queensland,” wrote the Premier in an online statement.

“Jullian Assange, Australia’s answer to Steve Jobs. Bernard Fanning, our very own Elvis – and Carl Baron, who is Australia’s own Dave Chappelle.”

“Other states have produced some fine people, but we produce the best.” she said.

Many Queenslanders have lauded the decision, saying that they feel like they’re smarter than the rest of Australia, because the most successful people in the country often opt to call it home.

 

Gilbert Freeman, of Sanctuary Cove, received an OP2 in his 2013 leaving exams. He’s since moved onto a plump role at Hutchinsons after completing an engineering degree at Bond University.

He now feels his raw intellect and professional finesse can be complimented by the number plate on his late model HSV saloon.

“Even though my mum rouses on me for smoking around the kids, I always knew I was a clever cunt. Now whenever her or the missus tries to call me dumb, I just tell ’em, ‘go outside and look at me fucken number plate, ya bitch. Tell me I’m dumb now and I’ll give ya a gobfull of me best. Slut dog,’ and they bloody shut up after that.

Freeman then hung up on us.

More to come.

1 COMMENT

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here