After learning that a lot of people listening to his Channel Nine cricket commentary aren’t really enjoying it, Michael Clarke has gone into damage control today, with a rebrand on the horizon.

“Maybe it was the fact that I snitched on everyone in my autobiography, maybe it’s because cricket was the only thing people liked about me. I don’t know”

“But. I’ve got to do something. That $2m dollar advance I got for the book won’t last forever. Not with my taste in cars [laughter]”

Michael Clarke has decided to take cricket fans back to his glory days. With the return of his iconic frosted tips.

“The frosted tips are from a time when I was King. The AB Medal, Lara, the Ferrari. This is what the fans want”

However, fellow commentators aren’t so sure.

Close friend and fellow commentator, Shane Keith Warne says Clarke shouldn’t mix it up too much.

“Look at me mate. Sure I look a hell of a lot different to what I did twenty years ago, but the punters don’t want me to go back to Fat Warney”.

“Clarke should keep it tidy. He just needs to focus on commentating. He’s got the look sorted, the flash suit, the Bailey Nelsons… Mate, he’s even got a boat. It’s not his sense of style that’s letting him down, he’s looking good”

“The last thing he should do is go back to that little bratty park cricketer we first met ten years ago. He should be running from that”


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