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An ageing local pastoralist has thrown caution to the wind and dipped his head under the water of a local spa.

For the better part of his life, Stephen Taylor has been told that being fully submerged in a hydrotherapy pool is as dangerous throwing sheets of blue asbestos into a skip, but as he’s coming to the end of his stellar innings on this planet, he thought, ‘fuck it.’

“Yeah, I’m starting to blow a bit of smoke these days,” he said.

“The old heart is running a bit rich my doctor tells me, reckons my arteries are so stiff you could rip them out and flog a bloke into next week with them. Anyway, I just enjoyed a Peter Stuyvesant in the spa so I thought I’d double down and put my head under,”

“It was great and I survived.”

Mr Taylor’s bravery was in part rebuked by a CSIRO study into placing one’s head beneath the tide of a hot tub with the study concluding that it’s ‘actually pretty gross’ and ‘unhygienic.’

The 2010 report suggested that walking being naked, American and drunk in the ISIS-Syrian city of Raqqa is safer than being underwater in a spa, citing many hazards such as dead skin, scabs and body hair as being potential dangers.

Just last year, a 27-year-old Fremantle man died of shock after accidentally ingesting a stranger’s band aid in a Perth hydrotherapy pool.

More to come.

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