Research students at The Betoota Royal Hospital have stumbled upon a new sleep disorder, after conducting a study on whether tall people require more shut eye.

This study is said to have been spearheaded by earlier research suggesting a connection between height and longevity, which theorised that taller people are less likely to live as long as their shorter counterparts, as there’s essentially more of them that can do wrong.

Just like a crusty eyed Maltese terrier that refuses to die, short people are found to have a lower chance of developing cancer and heart problems. Though taller people are more likely to have higher incomes and be perceived as more intelligent, it appears the pendulum does swing in the shorter person’s favour every now and then.

Now, researchers have found that there might be another reason why taller people don’t live as long, which has nothing to do with their heart having to work so much harder – in fact, it all comes down to sleep. Our reporter chats to lead researcher Harold Crick, to find out more about this startling revelation.

“The numbers tend to skew depending on who you ask, but regularly getting less than seven hours sleep is shown to have an impact on your lifespan”, says Crick.

“We found that our tall recipients were averaging roughly three hours less sleep than shorter recipients, despite variables such as bed size and temperature controls switched around.”

“We didn’t know why until we set up the CCTV.”

Explaining further, Crick says the recipients could be seen tossing and turning all night and appeared to have trouble ‘placing their arms in a suitable position.’

“It was very simple actually”, says Crick, “tall people just don’t know what to do with their arms.”

“Can’t really curl them in a fetal position, can’t lie out flat either.”

“A victim of their long limbs, unfortunately.”

More to come.


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here