The impenetrable conglomerate of conservative politicians, who have worked hand-in-hand with Australia’s media families to suppress and belittle the 99% of the world’s scientists who have spent 50 years warning them about the grave consequences of burning fossil fuels into the atmosphere at an accelerating rate, are still refusing the accept the facts.

In an effort to keep the vast majority of Australia’s wealth and resources in the hands of a select few billionaire elites, the inconvenient truth of climate change still does not have to be true, according to the 80% of the Australian media landscape dominated by the Murdoch newspapers who have gutted their entire newsrooms to avoid any form of critical thinking that might hinder their mission to publish Liberal Party press releases word-for-word.

This follows the already unfolding predictions that this year will probably be the hottest in the past 100,000 years – as climate scientists warn global temperatures have soared to such an extent that Earth has entered “uncharted territory”.

Life on the planet is imperilled, says a group of 12 international scientists in a global stocktake on climate published today by the journal Bioscience that finds 20 of 35 identified planetary vital signs are at record extremes.

However, these cold hard facts are still not enough to convince the conservative political class to take action, out of fear that they might upset the multinational mining corporations that they have allowed to desecrate rural Australia for the royalty-free sale of the same fossil fuels that are causing record-breaking biannual bushfires and floods.

Speaking to The Betoota Advocate today, Canberra’s leading climate change deniers say the very real and urgent predictions are just radical leftist rhetoric.

“There’s something else going on” says former Deputy PM Barnaby Joyce, as he looks up to the sky.

“And it has nothing to do with our reliable and honest mining industry, or oil and gas for that matter”

Former PM Scott Morrison agrees.

“We really should stop the tall poppy syndrome directed towards the mining bosses. Lets focus on the real issues. Like trans people being on TV”

“Or Indigenous athletes not singing the anthem”

Peter Dutton agrees.

“We can talk about climate change all we want. But at the end of the day, it’s God that decides how hot it’s gonna get.”

“So, yeah. That’s it I guess. The so-called science is irrelevant here. We couldn’t have done anything to stop this”


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