In the world of AFL football, Carlton have only just bested a limping Richmond by five points at the MCG for round 1 last night.

Just one week after their 46 point pumping of Brisbane Lions at the Gabba, the Blues have been very lucky to notch two in a row. with 12.14 (86) to 12.9 (81) in front of 83,881 screaming Melbourne fans.

Meanwhile, in Queensland humid River City, the only people interested in this match of Aussie Rules have had to fight just as hard to get it on a TV screen.

Three young white collar workers, who likely work in finance or some form of policymaking role, made to the bold decision to politely ask a Brisbane publican if there is a possibility that they might be able to watch live AFL on one of the less important TV screens.

Hugo, Clarrie and Samson – all 28, and all raised in the same affluent inner-north Brisbane suburb, now feel that Queensland society has progressed to the point where they can comfortably out themselves as ‘AFL guys’.

For years, Brisbane’s CBD workers have been plagued by the stereotype of the Queen Street Cowboy, a term used to denigrate city boys who use their RM Williams boots and exaggerated accents to manufacture a proximity to rural Queensland.

However, with Brisbane growing by millions over the last few decades, the once sleepy capital is now very much an international city.

Brisbane’s reluctant transformation into a major city has given way to a new corporate archetype. The Hicktorians.

The hicktorians are white collar Queenslanders who present themselves as far more culturally aligned with the southern cities than their own – while not really being able to pull off either.

They do this by wearing normal business suits to work, rather than sports coats and moleskin trousers. They also wear dress shoes, as opposed to riding boots.

But the most identifiable Hicktorian trait is their weekly efforts to white knuckle it through 80 minutes of AFL football, despite not understanding all the rules, and not really having a team.

Unfortunately the hicktorians must still tread lightly in Brisbane, as their desires to appear like southern intellectuals is not exactly understood by majority of the city.

“Excuse me mate” said one of the boys quite politely.

“Any chance we can bung channel 7 on the Keno TV?”

“Ah” said the publican.

“Couple of Southerners aye. I could tell by your slim cut pants.”

“You’ve got half an hour until the regulars start piping up. Enjoy”


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