A young student attempting to survive on Youth Allowance is kicking himself today, after missing his opportunity to live large on the company card.

Six weeks into an internship at the prestigious Hunter-Wood & Jamesons firm in Betoota’s finance district, 3rd year law student Dan Hardwell has never worked harder in his life, nor has he ever had to live so frugally.

Having spent the past few weeks surviving on the free office toast and fruit, Dan was reportedly pretty nervous to join a table of company executives who offered him the chance to head out for a Friday pub lunch.

Now seated amongst a table of triple figure salary men and women at The Crown and Anchor Pub in the Old Town district, Dan spent several minutes trying to find the cheapest thing on the menu, and settled on two pieces of garlic bread for a bargain price of $9.50.

However as his two boats of stale buttered bread arrived on the table, Dan experienced a pretty serious case of food envy, as he looked around and noticed plates of scotch fillet steaks and teriyaki salmon being placed in front of his colleagues.

“Before we start, I’d just like to thank everyone for the month of hard work,” bellowed Ellis Kirkland, the managing partner of the firm.

“Especially young Dan, really putting in the hard yards in the photocopier room this week, I know we all appreciate it!’ Ellis added, to a chorus of sniggers from his colleagues.

“Enjoy lunch everyone, this one is on us!”

Almost choking on the first bite of garlic bread, Dan’s lunch turned pretty sour after he realised he had missed the first chance he’s had in weeks to indulge in some red meat or seafood.

Helping himself to the last dregs of beer in a jug on the table, Dan decided he’d have to make up for his efforts by getting as pissed as possible over the next few company funded rounds.

More to come.


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