A bloke who hit it way too hard this weekend has faced the repercussions of his hedonistic behaviour, when his bowels staged a protest that Sunday morning.

Citing that he ‘hasn’t shit right for months’, Kevin Robins is well known for his love of partying, often finding an excuse to drink for any occasion – whether it was a birthday, a promotion, getting fired or simply just to catch up.

Kevin has caught up with his mate Lachie from Adelaide for this weekend’s excuse, who was equally as enthusiastic about getting on the turps.

And with promises of picklebacks and the potential to get some tabs, Kevin had been all set for a weekend filled with laughs, late-night philosophy chats, and consoling each other when their minds expanded a little bit too much.

Though Kevin’s heavy drinking has surprisingly not affected his looks at all, it’s his stomach that’s faced the brunt of his alcohol abuse – as evident by the household’s mutual agreement that the toilet should be avoided at all costs on Sundays.

As he felt that all too familiar thud at his backdoor, Kevin went off in search of relief when he was met with resistance, causing him to build up a sweat as he put all of his horsepower into it. Tired, hungover and now disgustingly clammy, he figured the least he could do was salvage his fresh linen shirt and strip himself bare before peeling himself off the toilet like velcro.

More to come.


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