Given the fact that he has rooted some of the hottest chicks to ever appear on Ramsay street, experts from the CSIRO have today confirmed that Neighbours stalwart, Jarrod Vincenzo Rebecchi must be a good root.

For many obvious reasons, none more blatant than the fact that he used to put away Dee, viewers can only assume that the big fella must lay some serious pipe.

Professor Leon Bott from federal research agency, the Commonwealth Scientific and Industrial Research Organisation (CSIRO) says that for a bloke who has spent most of his adulthood rocking a mullet, goatee and about 20-30 extra kegs, Toadie definitely does pretty well for himself when it comes to his love life.

“What we have found is that most people who are as unassuming and innocent as the toadfish have a track record like he does, they are usually animals in the sack.”

The long list of conquests, colloquially known as ‘Toadie’s Angels’ all refuse to comment on the suburban solicitor’s prowess, which suggests he must be a cracker in the sack.

“If he’s seriously thrown a bit of length at all those chicks… Fuck me, he must be double jointed or something,” said Professor Bott.

Toadfish was approached for comment but was unable to speak with our reporters as he was busy organising the will of a neighbour who has been struck down with amnesia and can’t remember his own wife, who is hot.


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here