The Nation

Guy Who Used To Sack Wack Year 8s In High School Starts Posting From Men’s Only Health Retreat

KEITH T. DENNETT | REAL LIFE | CONTACTA former high school bully has emerged from the swamps of Instagram this week to announce he now really cares about helping other blokes fulfil their potential. Tyler Goggins, a 30 year old Betoota Ponds plumber and now podcast host, has gone live on social media to preach his new brand of men’s wellness, a cause he...

Humble Bragger Flexes His Eurotrip By Asking If Anyone Knows Where To Watch Origin In Helsinki

KEITH T. DENNETT | REAL LIFE | CONTACTDarby Humphries has been travelling Europe for the past six weeks, and don’t all his friends know about it. An accountant by trade, Darby was able to broker a luxurious six week winter holiday this year, given his father is the head of the firm that he currently works for. After spending the first week smashing £10 pints...

Sooky Englishman Still Grieving That It’s Never Coming Home Because His Country Is Shit At Soccer

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A local whingeing and sunburnt pom is today still having a cry over the fact that his national side sucks so much at soccer that it would completely bottle it in the Euros final twice in a row. This comes nearly two full days after England lost 2-1 to Spain in the final of the European Championship in Germany,...

Tenacious D Rebrand To Softcock D

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactJack Black has today announced on his Instagram that Tenacious D will be officially rebranding to Softcock D, after he and his creative partner, Kyle Gass, chose to cut their world tour short, due to a comment Gass made about the assassination attempt on Trump. During their live show in Sydney on Sunday, Gass was presented with a cake...

Local Girl Feels Sudden Urge To Convert To Christianity After Being Abused By Street Preacher Outside Town Hall

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA woman running errands in Betoota CBD has found herself being converted to christianity this morning, after being yelled at by a street preacher with an obnoxiously loud microphone.  Jasmine Dawson, 27, says she’d simply ducked into the CBD to grab a few items from Big W, when she found himself walking directly into the path of a bloke...

Former BLF Union Members Disgusted By Recent Allegations That The CFMEU Has Gone Soft

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT As a parting gift to the Liberal Party, outgoing Nine Chairman and former Coalition treasurer Peter Costello has this week flooded his syndicated news outlets with allegations of corruption and organised crime links within Australia's most powerful trade union. A recent 60 Minutes report has revealed that the construction division of the Construction, Forestry and Maritime Employees Union (CFMEU)...

Gold Coast Woman Gives Up On Tinder And Just Browses The Daily Court Lists Instead

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact A Gold Coast woman with appalling taste in men has decided to just cut to the chase today, by looking up blokes she found on the Queensland daily court list. Jessica Rose, 28, says that this method was far quicker than swiping on Tinder, citing that she’s now ‘guaranteed’ to get someone with a criminal record. “I used to just...

Girl Who Once Got Her Tragus Pierced At ‘Off Ya Tree’ Knows Exactly What Trump Is Going Through Right Now

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA Brisbane woman who once had her ear completely fucked up by an Off Ya Tree piercer, says she knows ‘exactly’ how Donald Trump must be feeling today, after having his ear clipped by a bullet (or shards from a teleprompter glass, depending on who you ask) during his rally yesterday in Butler, Pennsylvania. The former US president/ sex...

Nation’s Millennial Women Still Harbour Dreams To One Day Build The Practical Magic House

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactIt can be confirmed that every millennial woman who watched the movie ‘Practical Magic’, still harbours desires to build an exact replica of the Owens sister's house should they ever get their hands on a cool $10 million. The gothic Victorian mansion, which sadly only ever existed as an architectural shell that was immediately torn down after filming, has...

Local White Guy Straps On Go-Pro For Dare Devilish Day At Perisher

KEITH T. DENNETT | REAL LIFE | CONTACTA local daredevil is capturing the action this morning, as he makes his way down the perilous Australian slopes.Filming his daring display of athletic abilities in 4K HD as he french fries down a blue run, local finance manager Austin Simpson is believed to be pretty keen to show off his footage to his colleagues back...

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