Another day, and another sign that the world is going M A D.

That’s according to 56-year-old Betoota Heights Builder Phil ‘Snowy’ Charlton.

The career project home installer from our town’s booming property industry says that he doesn’t know where we’ll be in 10-20 years time.

Not because he’s worried the housing crisis is going to cause huge rifts between different societal groups, but because kids these days just haven’t got what it takes anymore.

“Mate, these bottle fed young fellas are made of fucking glass,” said the bloke in charge of a crew of 14 who hasn’t picked up the Paslode in over 6 weeks.

“There so sensitive about everything,” continued old Phil, who went off his handle at one of the young apprentices who said he wasn’t going to be having a barbie on the 26th of January.

“And let me tell ya, there work ethic has gone to shit.”

Phil says that one top of an inability to work for him for 14 bucks an hour, the lazy little shits can’t even cop a joke.

“Fuck me, you can’t even have a laugh on site anymore,” explained Phil, whose idea of a joke is recycling the same pronouns sledge multiple times a day.

“I couldn’t even imagine what would happen if actually played a proper prank on em now.”

“Back in the day we used to wait for em to go in for a shit, lock em in the portaloo and then kick it over,” he laughed.

“Used to be an absolute pisser, or shitter actually.”

“The last decent one we did was pin the kid down and nail his shirts and pants to the yellowtongue so he couldn’t get up without ripping all his clothes.”

“He was all sooky about it too.”

“Back in my day, I used to love getting hazed, that’s just part of being an apprentice.”

“Not anymore though.”

“Fucking joke.”


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