ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

A Betoota Heights handbag told this ‘left-leaning’ newspaper this morning that he’s currently finding it very difficult to defend the actions of his beloved Federal Government while maintaining the respect of his family and ‘so-called’ friends.

Mark Heaster, who despite trying his hardest, was not the breadwinner of his family. That alone is enough to emasculate the man to the point where his personality is ultimately defined and underpinned by his deep-seated loathing of the Labor Party.

His friends say he wasn’t always like this. He never used to get into loud arguments in restaurants with his family over Centrelink payments to disabled people and how women are responsible for most of the trouble in the world.

The 57-year-old’s daughter, who asked to remain anonymous because of how unstable Mark has become, explained to our reporter that her Dear Old Dad changed when Sky News started to be broadcast free-to-air over the WIN network.

“He calls us dumb little lefties and yells at the television all night,” she said.

“It’s so strange because politics never used to interest him. Sure, he voted for John Howard but that’s because he was a small business owner and still in the closet with his racism. But now, he’s just become to unpleasant to be around.”

She let out a long sigh and looked out the window.

“I don’t respect him as a person at all. There’s defending the government and then there’s defending this government. Where do you draw the line?”

Mark’s wife agreed with her daughter’s sentiments but said she wasn’t prepared to go on the record.

And one of the Big Man’s mates down at his local municipal golf course said Mark’s become very hard to deal with.

“It shows a man’s intelligence. Not who they vote for but who they blindly follow upon receiving instruction from known sus cunts like Andrew Bolt. The way that creepy cunt speaks, he makes people like Mark feel like they’re intelligent for thinking the Greens are responsible for the Sydney floods and things of that nature. That smooth delivery. It makes what he’s saying sound rational when in reality, he’s saying things like old men shouldn’t be held responsible for giving into temptation and raping a young boy,” they said.

“And on top of that, you’ve got people like Mark saying that’s completely OK,”

“He feels like he’s on some righteous path that’s beset on all sides by vicious lefties looking to take in down. When all that’s really happening is something much less noble and ultimately depressing for anyone who ever loved him.”

More to come.


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