ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

Saint Barnabas of Danglemah kept true to his word at the Simpson Desert Cattleman’s Association Gala dinner in Betoota last night, sticking to the non-alcoholic drinks for the entire evening.

The former Prime Minister even drove himself home from the function in what’s been described as a strange occurrence and a departure from what the district’s beef producers have come to expect over the years.

Association President Digby Sterling told The Advocate the evening was magical by all accounts.

“No, it was great, mate. It was a wonderful evening,” he said.

“Barnaby was charming and making light of the whole situation. You know, not taking himself too seriously. It was a nice change, you know. We thought he’d get up there and tell us all that Brahman hump is tougher than a Guangzhou gumboot and nobody likes it. But yeah, he said it was actually quite nice. He was on those bloody Heaps Normal things that you know, you drink when you’re absolutely tonguing for one but you’re taking a break from binge drinking,”

“He would’ve have over 30 of them. No shadow of a doubt there. I know it’s bloody stones in glass houses or whatever but he was fond of the finger food before hand. I would’ve had three cans and about 10 aranchini balls with Barnaby before we even went inside. There were mini pizzas and quiches. The quiches are a bit funny but the mini meat pies were bang on. There’s a good chance it’d be local meat too, being in a frozen mini meat pie. It’s not exactly Glen Innes out here as you’d know.”

Mr Joyce’s office did confirm that no alcohol was consumed by the Shadow Minister for Veteran’s Affairs last night and the Brahman hump was cooked to perfection.

More to come.

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