ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

A pair of sanctimonious sexagenarians feel karma paid them a visit today after they came face to face with a young city worker who was obviously battling the spicy cough as they did their grocery shop.

Norma and Penguin Coleman, both of the Flight Path District, explained that they thought it was karma because they lodged a complaint this morning with the Betoota City Shire Council this morning because a pub down the street had amplified music over the weekend.

They told The Advocate that they were on the fence about making the complaint, partly because they didn’t want to appear to be that type of senior Australian.

“We’re the type of person that the young people don’t like,” said Penguin.

“Norma and I made some money in business and we lived a good life, now we’ve sold the family home in Betoota Grove and we moved to the Flight Path District to help our children, who we shoehorned into the property market as well, gentrify the place until it looks like a nicer version of what it is now. Just without the poor people,”

“There is a pub down the road called The Cottaging Coach Inn. It’s a nice English-style pub. The food is not too bad but the rump steak is $11, which is a rip-off. On Saturday night, they had a young man there to play music and against their noise management plan, they had amplified music. So we had to make a complaint. They tied our hands.”

However, Norma now feels they shouldn’t have because now the universe is out to get them.

“We did our grocery shop this afternoon and it almost cost us our lives,” she said.

“There was a man who was coughing himself in knots. Half the time, he didn’t even cover his mouth. He was coughing all over the produce. He had the spicy cough, it was so obvious. God is trying to punish us for being a grass,”

“At our age, even if it doesn’t kill us, it can knock us around. It can remove a certain quality of life and not give it back. The government should lock everybody down again because I’ve only just got access to my super. I have things to buy.”

More to come.


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