ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

The Shadow Minister for Veterans Affairs Barnaby Joyce is determined to have his old boss’ book pulped as he refutes claims that he and Scott Morrison are or ever were ‘best mates’.

An except from the former Prime Minister’s book, ‘Plans For Your Good’, detailed the relationship between the two party leaders with Morrison detailing just how close they were.

“During the pandemic, my relationship with Barnaby Joyce grew in ways I never expected. Amidst the relentless pressure of managing the crisis, Barnaby became my closest confidant. While Josh and I were close, we were never on the same wavelength. We started having late-night phone calls, where we would share our worries and hopes for the future of our country. One memorable night, we discovered our mutual passion for obscure Aussie rock bands like AC/DC and Daddy Cool, and what began as a simple conversation turned into a spirited jam session over Zoom. Barnaby does this falsetto voice like Neil Young. It’s magical. This shared love of music brought us even closer. Our weekly catch-ups soon became a cherished routine, providing a much-needed escape and strengthening our friendship through laughter and mutual support. We quickly became best mates.”

Despite Nielsen BookScan showing that at the time of print, Mr Morrison’s book has sold a total of 521 copies around the county, Mr Joyce has told our reporter this weekend at the Imperial Hotel in Glen Innes that he was determined to set the record straight.

“While I’m in danger of this having the same Streisand Effect has Gina’s portrait, actually, nobody is going to buy Scott’s 500-page sleeping pill anyway, but that section where he says we’re best mates is fucking defamatory in the extreme,” he said.

“I mean, look around this pub. None of these creatures are going to read Scott’s book. That bloke over there, I know for a fact he can’t even read the specials board in the bistro. But if it ever comes out, it’ll severely damage my reputation. It’s just not correct. That part where he says he jammed via Zoom never happened,”

“It’s like he’s goading me into suing him to jack up the book sales. It’s really boiled my piss.”

More to come.


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