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A group of five girlfriends have been told to shut the fuck up this evening, because Hayley is back in the game.

While catching up for their bi-monthly girls dinner, the group of girls who make up a fusion of both work and high school friends, have got some serious goss to sink their teeth into.

Most notably, the fact that Hayley’s drought has broken, in a big way – with a temporary but fucking hot gym junkie named Kyle that she met at the physiotherapist of all places.

“He’s not a physio. But like he does something like that” says Hayley, who will not be marrying this man.

The group alpha, Katie, was the first to pick up on an out-of-place chirpiness at the table – and was almost psychic in her assumptions that Hayley has been getting the pipe.

After a bit of pushing, she starts getting some oil.

While the rest of the table continues gas-bagging, Katie needs to reign in their attention, because they are gonna wanna hear this.

“SHUT UP EVERYONE” says Katie!

Everyone looks, fearing the worst from that end of the table, like a pregnancy or something.

“Hayley has been getting it”

As the subsequent woohoo sounds echo right across the restaurant, even diners as far as the front door of the restaurant appear to know what these girls are talking about.

It’s established quite early on in the retelling of this explosive and passionate romance that Kyle is missing a few roos in the top paddock, but it is also made clear that Hayley wasn’t looking to get an intellectual companion out of this relationship.

As the table begins to get more and more rowdy throughout the course of Hayley’s quite visual recount of their first root, a cluey restaurant manager realises where he needs to me right now.

“Shots, ladies?” asks Pablo.

“On the house”

[hysterical girl noises]

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