TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact

The age old social faux pas of asking a woman her age may be made redundant today after a report released by the CSIRO revealed you can now determine someone’s age without even speaking to them. 

The year-long study carefully monitored two separate groups of women, one in their twenties and the other in their thirties.

And, despite dressing and behaving virtually the same way, there was one thing they did differently.

“It’s what we are calling the invisible switch” Dr. Belit told The Advocate over a couple of Negronis. 

“Throughout a person’s twenties an Aperol Spritz is the drink of choice, but as soon as they hit 30 it becomes Negroni” 

“It’s bizarre!” 

“Especially considering how many other drink options there are.”

The Advocate reached out to two of the women from the study to see whether or not they agreed with the report and if they felt victimised by their new labels. 

“I’ll never drink Negronis, they so bitter!” said the woman in her twenties, who will definitely make the switch when she’s older. 

“Aperol is far too sweet and basic” the thirty-something woman said, forgetting that she’s just spent the past decade knocking back the very drink she’s criticising.  

Dr Belit tells The Advocate that the next stage of the report will be looking into the outlier drink choices and what they can tell us about a person’s age, it’s been confirmed that a piña colada will be next. 

More to come. 

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