The Nation

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Reporters from literally every single media outlet in the country stood in front of Malcolm Turnbull moments ago with outstretched hands holding zoom recorders and iPhones. Unfortunately, after twenty minutes, he was unable to give any of them anything close to a sound bite. "Well" he started with, quite confidently. "The thing is..." "Trump." "ummmm " "" When asked his thoughts on the current...

1 February, 2016. 13:23 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Her Majesty The Queen has addressed calls for The Crown to cancel a planned state visit by US president Donald Trump later in the year by telling the media that no such thing will happen. However, Queen Elizabeth did offer some advice to the president for when he visits Paris in the...

JOHN PEARSON | Television | Contact Some Australians are mortified this evening, other's were entertained after the Nine Network's 'Married At First Signs of Mental Illness' concludes. The nightly offering from Nine in this post-apocalyptic post-sporting cricket stretch of television has broken records as the first show on local screens to feature people that are almost completely detached from reality. "We wanted...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Betoota Ponds teenager, Alex Murphy is particularly interested in the rich culture of Tonga and Samoa, it has been confirmed. While sounding like a run-of-the-mill Aussie kid when he is at home with his parents, Scott and Trace, Alex lives a completely different life when he is 'in the trap' - a term our reporters have come to learn means...

31 January, 2016. 12:34 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The prime minister has revealed this afternoon that he's spent the past 48 hours in a hammock reflecting on his life and how he ended up in a situation such as the one that's been presented to him in the past week. While many dual citizens of Australia and now-blacklisted Islamic nations...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Local woman, Wendy Laidley (58) has never ever seen a Sudanese person in real life, but she says from what she's seen on the news, coming out of one of these cities down south, they are absolutely out of control. The 2007 death of a nearby Polish-born cafe-owner, Zuzzanna, meant that everyone within 1000 kilometres of Wendy's was officially...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact If Jelena Brankovich was heading to her partner's family home for afternoon tea today, she'd be lucky to get a boiled egg and a cigarette. But this afternoon, the 24-year-old drug and alcohol counsellor and her partner were treated to a sizable feast that can only be reasonable if you were raised under communism. "There was an...

30 January, 2016. 11:34 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Venturing from his cubicle isn't something Michael Halpin does too often during the day - but today he had good reason to. Hopping out of bed yesterday morning in a sickly wobbly state, he trod on his fiance's glasses that by no fault of hers - were on the floor at the...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Last night Channel Ten debuted what has been the longest ever advertisement for South African Tourism in the shape of their new reality TV show "I have a medium-sized social media presence! Get me some work". The program managed to pull in over 1.1 million viewers less than half the amount of people than tuned it to watch two...

PUTNEY SWOPE| Non-Contact Sports | CONTACT As the end of the 2017 Australian Open drew to a climatic close, a nation of spectators stood silently in emotions other than awe. After having an extremely lukewarm rendition of Cindy Lauper’s “I See Your True Colours” preface the women’s finals Saturday night, the audience members of Rod Laver Arena, and unfortunately the wider world...