The Nation

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact One of the commonwealth's most senior public servants has asked the country how good cricket is, despite not even knowing how to spell the name of the most-in-form batsman in the national team. Scott Morrison, the Prime Minister, likes cricket as much as Malcolm Turnbull likes the Australian Tax Office. But that doesn't stop him...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A self-confessed political junkie is struggling to find someone interested in the UK General Election this afternoon down the pub, he says. Max Dollarhyde cornered our reporter just after 3pm at the Gelded Seahorse, where The Advocate is having a modest Christmas Party. While he lamented on Corbyn losing and how the world could be different...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The nation has thrown support behind striking Jetstar workers today, saying people who maintain aircraft deserve to be paid a livable wage. From the captain to the cleaner, Jetstar staff are walking off the job today and the weekend in protest of their low pay and poor working conditions. But the revelation that some of...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A pair of French Quarter tech professionals spent this morning scrolling through the local job listings after getting a bit too festive last night at the company Christmas Party. Dennis Roland, one of the Verntura employees currently curled up in bed on the verge of crying as he looks for another job, said the evening...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Overpriced fast food joint Grill'd have discreetly contacted the Rural Fire Service today. The company responsible for ripping off workers through a bullshit 'traineeship program' they use to justify underpaying staff, have enquired with the emergency service regarding some of their volunteers. The traineeship program operates under the premise that the $370 million dollar company pays people far...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Big Four Bank Westpac has today brought its shareholders in to discuss the fact they should probably stop facilitating child exploitation and terrorism. Hosting it's annual AGM, the Chairman of the Bank said the executives were very sorry for breaching anti-money laundering and counter-terrorism laws on 23 million occasions and have humbly decided not to award themselves some...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A breeding pair of Betoota Grove septuagenarians were left gobsmacked after being fined for using a hose on a hard surface today. The Greater Betoota Area is currently under Class 4A water restrictions that prohibit the use of water on hard surfaces at all times. Roberta and Colon Gerbil-Tickle own six houses, two of which are...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT While swathes of NSW (Newcastle, Sydney And Wollongong) battle through a thick blanket of smoke, one local man is quietly revelling in the conditions. Despite the fact smoke and bushfires have affected huge parts of NSW and Queensland for months, the smoke lying over Sydney has caused quite a scene. 28-year-old Phil Evans (or 'Carrot' as he's known on-site)...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Be careful who you throw food dye on next year at Deni because it could be one of the most successful tech entrepreneurs in the world. Elon Musk is committed but unable to confirm that he will attend the 2021 Deniliquin Ute Muster with his new Cyber Truck - or Cyber Ute as he's calling...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Earlier today, NSW Health officials recommended that Sydney residents stay indoors between 11.00am and 4.00pm if possible, as the combination of a 30-40 degree day and severe air pollution may present severe health risks for the elderly and those with respiratory issues. While dense bushfire smoke has been near-permanent fixture in Sydney for the last few weeks, the...