The AFL has finally responded to a set of damning allegations that were levelled in parliament yesterday.

Instead of trying to sweep things under the carpet like they normally do, league bosses have chosen to come clean about the raft of claims made by noted transparency activist Andrew Wilkie.

“It’s time we addressed the speculation. Drug use within the AFL is acceptable IF the players are good at footy, or they went to one of the schools that we went to,” explained a spokesperson for the league.

The bombshell revelation comes after Wilkie used parliamentary privilege to reveal a long list of claims levelled at the Melbourne Demons and the AFL.

Wilkie spoke with the support of the Melbourne Demons former club doctor (who was sacked for trying to speak up about the club culture) and the former Club President who Wilkie claims “was dumped by the AFL just eight weeks after a meeting with AFL CEO Gillon McLachlan and AFL chair Richard Goyder where he suggested mandatory drug testing for AFL executives.”

Wilkie claims that the Melbourne Demons had a hook up with a ‘clandestine’ pathology lab, who would test players ahead of game days and tell them to fake an injury if they were returning positive tests to illicit substances.

He claims that the hook up for the pathology lab was provided by a former chief health officer of the AFL, suggesting that league bosses may have been aware of rampant drug use within the game.

He also claims the league pretended to be unaware of illicit drug use, something which seems incredulous given the league’s long history of covering up scandals and protecting its own.

The allegations come amidst the back drop of the AFL’s 3 strike policy, which has nabbed like 1 player in years.

While Demons coach Simon Goodwin has offered up the predictable line that he had no idea any of this was going on, the AFL spokesperson has let his guard down.

“Mate, if you went to a Kevins or a Trinity or a Geelong Grammar then yes, you can get on the bags and avoid the repercussions of anti-doping authorities.”

“Or if you are pretty good at footy.”

“If you are good at footy and from one of our old boy schools, then you are safe as houses.”

“But it’s a case by case basis for these things, if you know what I mean.”

More to come.


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