The Former Deputy Prime Minister appeared rather distant during question time today, as he spent up to 45 minutes fantasising about the upcoming Joyce Christmas at Mooloolaba.

While Treasurer Scott Morrison sparred with opposition MP’s about plans for extra schools funding, the Member for New England began to drift off, while thinking about a tray full of Moreton Bay bugs and an esky stacked with Crownies and ice.

The 52-year-old has for many years spoken about his love of the Sunshine Coast Bushie-Mecca of Mooloolaba, a pilgrimage he makes every Summer holidays either for Christmas or Australia Day and has done since he was an accountant based in Western Queensland.

Speaking to The Betoota Advocate while having a cigarette outside the Ministerial Wing of Parliament House, Joyce said Mooloolaba is just one of those places where he really gets to turn off.

“Mate. It has been one hell of a year [puffs cigarette].

“I cannot fucking wait. In two weeks time I’ll be drinking pint-sized rum and cokes and eating more prawns than the Sunshine Beach Woolies is willing to give up”

“I’m already planning the road trip We’ll be up there by the 18th”

“I guess I’ve earned a bit of a break after this year. I’m rooted.

“It’s like every day is the day after a hangover. Worn out”


  1. Could he be making a rod for his own back moving his department to his electorate. The price of coffee will go up: a vote loser right there. If they recruit the local sons and daughters, how will the anti-government families feel about having bureaucrats at the dinner table. How will all these people vote at the preselections.


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