Report: It’s Never Coming Home
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Never ever. Hahahaha. After 60 long years of carry on, the English have once again proven
The Nation
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Modern Day Nelson Mandela Fights Segregation By Abusing Cafe Worker For Following Health Guidelines
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A local human rights activist has caused a bit of a scene down in the French
With Sydney Free, Melbourne Finally Concede That They Should’ve Just Locked Down Hard And Fast
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT As Sydney emerges from a fifteen week lockdown, it has become clear that Victoria should have
Extremely Busy And Important Husband Cherry Picks Clean Undies From Dryer Rather Than Unload It
EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE | CONTACT Hovering next to the dryer, local bloke Sean Cooper has a split second to make a
“Cool” Says QLD, WA, SA, TAS And NT After NSW Premier Claims He’s ‘Leading Nation Out Of This’
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The rest of the nation has responded to NSW’s bold comments yesterday. As the southern
Problem Gambler Glad To Return To The VIP Lounge After 5 Months Gambling On Egyptian Soccer
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A local Banksmeadow man and pokies enthusiast has expressed relief this week, after making
Bankstown Barber’s Hair Clippers Starting To Blow Smoke After 187 Fades In The Last 12 Hours
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Barber shops have reopened across Greater Sydney this week, after 4 long months of Home &
Barnaby Pauses War On Social Media To Find Out Who Took A Shit On The Floor Of The TAB At The Dungowan Pub
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Deputy Prime Minister Barnaby Joyce has temporarily shelved his war on social media to
Sydney Fuckwit Asks Financially Crippled Publican If He’s Doing Any Welcome Back Specials Haha
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A local Sydney man has outed himself as a deadset fuckwit, demonstrating the nerve
Vibrating Counter Meal Buzzer Brings Table Of Sydney Residents To Climax
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A pub lunch has brought four co-workers to climax this afternoon, after experiencing
Jesus To Perrottet: “Fuck Me! My Dad’s Plan Never Said Anything About 10000 Cunts At The Everest!”
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The Son of God, Mr Jesus Christ, has lashed the NSW Premier’s plan
Excited Sydney Pub Proudly Welcomes Back Patrons With Three New Piss Cakes In The Trough
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A special treat for pub patrons today, as Erskinville establishment ‘The Stinky Bishop’ rolled
Sydney Hairdresser Erupts Into Crazed Laughter After Being Asked If She’s Got A Spot This Arvo
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT HAHA WHAT!?? Across Sydney today, fully jabbed residents have been granted new freedoms to drinks piss