LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
Queensland Police have done something newsworthy this week but with the delightful twist that they are not in hot water for it.
In collaboration with the Australian Border Force, Queensland Police intercepted a cocaine shipment with a street value of $135 million dollars that was intended to make its way to Betoota in time for a bucks do.
The $135M worth of coke is the biggest ever shipment of cocaine ever intercepted by Australian law enforcement who confirmed it’s purity by bumping a little and realising they were fastforwarding every song on their playlist to get to the good bit.
“It’s the purest sample we’ve ever seen,” stated one border force agent, enjoying Jamiroquai for the first time in 20 years.
“It’s at least 20% cocaine!”
The border force agent then went on to talk about how classism is the biggest issue facing society and how it could all be solved if people could just accept their differences and try to make the most out of a flawed capitalist system.
