Pauline Excited To Get A Free Spaceship After Close Friend Gina Rinehart Purchases $1B Share In SpaceX
SANDY FRASER | Youth | CONTACT Australia’s richest person, Gina Rinehart, has purchased a $1 Billion share in Elon Musk’s
The Nation
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Local Personal Trainer Discreetly Asks His Client To Explain What A Tax Return Is
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT As the end of the financial year looms closer and closer, one local health and fitness
Her Majesty’s Birthday Currently Accelerating Sunday Session At Rather Alarming Rate
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Local systems manager, Luke Farley, is now confident enough to throw caution to the wind. With
Link Established Between Winning Grand Slams And Not Carrying On Like A Fucking Pelican
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet |CONTACT In some breaking news out of the French capital of Paris overnight, it has been confirmed
“Oh My Goodness! We Had No Idea It Was That Bad” Says The AFL
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT After providing an environment that fostered a mob mentality amongst hundreds of thousands of fans to
Dad Calls To Mock Local Man’s Recent Car Purchase
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Upon hearing his son had bought himself an MG, a local sexagenarian wondered if
Nation Unanimously Decides On Replacing Advance Australia Fair With The Nosebleed Section
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Public debate surrounding the national anthem’s inclusiveness to Aboriginal communities has today been put to
Townsville Man Reluctantly Puts On One Of Them Shirts With Buttons As Temperature Dips To 22°
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT An unprecedented cold front has resulted in a complete overhaul of day-to-day wardrobes in
Prospective Whistleblower Picks Up A Will Kit Before Sending Leaked Documents
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A local government worker planning on leaking classified information to the media has picked
Barrie Cassidy Valiantly Boromirs Himself To Protect Journalistic Integrity During AFP Raids
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The Australian Federal Police are today reporting that their highly intrusive raids of the ABC were
Dutton Furiously Takes Notes During Last Night’s Return Of The Handmaid’s Tale
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet |CONTACT After a busy week, Home Affairs Minister and aspiring head of the future Ministry Of Truth,
Man Depressed At The State Of The Nation Tunes Into The Cricket To Cheer Himself Up
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A Betoota Heights man who confided in friends earlier today that he was feeling
Prime Minister Assures Journalists If They Have A Go, They’ll Get A Go, In Prison Lol
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Prime Minister Scott Morrison has today addressed claims by the media, and his election-weary opposition,