Arnott's Bird Taken In For H5N1 Avian Flu Testing
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT An icon of Australian pantries and lunch boxes has caused a scare today, after being whisked
The Nation
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Scotty Celebrates A Brief Distraction From His Woeful Jab Stroll Out
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The nation’s Head of Marketing is today enjoying a brief reprieve from shirking responsibility and
PM: “Well, My Last Interaction With The Press Went Poorly. See You Guys In 7-10 Working Days”
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The Prime Minister said his last press conference didn’t go so well so
“Cool. I Guess” Says The Rest Of Australia As Brisbane Wins The 2032 Olympics Bid
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The major cities and towns of Queensland have just enough freedom for their Premier Annastacia Palaszczuk
With No Major Outbreaks, Tasmanian Government Struggles To Distract Voters From Housing Crisis
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The leader of the island outpost of Tasmania has today revealed he kinda wouldn’t mind
“Look Them In The Eyes When They’re Talking To You!” Grandpa Kev Makes Scotty Face The Media
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT TIME TO MAN UP KID: Scotty From Marketing has pulled up just short of apologising for
ABC Hoping To Bring A More Chilled Out Vibe To Q&A After Naming Costa Georgiadis As New Host
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT I’LL TAKE THAT AS A REALLY COOL COMMENT: The ABC has this week had to
Annastacia Offers Olympic Organisers 7 Million Bucks To Relocate Tokyo Games To Townsville
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The Premier of Queensland has today made another last-ditch pitch to snag a major sporting
Sydney Tradie Relives His Days As An Apprentice By Starting Morning With A Gatorade Sax Solo
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT BUFFALO TRADESMAN: The state recorded 110 new locally acquired cases – of which 44 were reportedly out
Government Demands UNESCO Relabel Barrier Reef With Less Alarming “Goin Through Sum Shit”
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The Federal Government has today revealed that they’ve gone all out on an international lobbying
Report: You Have Well And Truly Fucked This One, Mate
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT With three major cities in lockdown tonight, a vast majority of the Australian population is currently
“She Hates The Heat” Dad Still Stands By His Theory That The Virus Disappears In Summer
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A local father of four has today offered up some hope for our flailing nation. With
“What The Fuck Is That?” Asks Grandpa Kev As Scotty Returns Home With Fluffy White Pomeranian
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Australia’s former Prime Minister Kevin Rudd has today come to terms with the fact that